just passed my research proposal yesterday. and i gotta admit, it felt damn good!

the second semester of our third year is now officially over. what a relief! now we're facing our so called "summer" vacation. then it's work, work, work,  and school.

oh joy! *snorts*

while i was doing my paper the other day, i couldn't help but reminisce bout what i felt and experienced three years ago (during & after high school). remembering what is was like living in the suburbs felt like it was like an eternity. like a dream where i could do what i want, when i could be carefree and trouble free, when i didn't have to worry about a lot of stuff. back then, i was able to focus my time and attention in my passions and interests. i had time to sketch. i had time to play guitar. i had time to play basketball. i had time to read a book. i had time to ride my bike. i had time to spend with my friends. i had time to just walk around and think. there weren't many distractions. there wasn't much to do. no internet. no malls. no parties. no cellphones (yes, i wasn't a serial texter then). no noise. no smoke from vehicles. no floods. no traffic. no need to hurry. no need to be so protective of my things when i go out. no need to be so wary of the people around me. it was relaxed. calming. peaceful. slow. quiet. clean. fresh.

i never thought i'd miss those days. well, most of it.

this must be what it feels like when, you know, you're growing up. becoming an adult. getting OLD. not that i hate it. it's quite exciting really. the freedom. the power. the opportunities. the new roads to take and new territories to explore. the new people to meet. the chances to make yourself a better person. the responsibilities. the mistakes. the apologies we'll have to make and the lessons we'll keep and learn. the tears and the laughter. the smiles and the frowns. the highs and the lows. all of that and more. i look forward to it. very much.

do i sound like i've graduated? *laughs* nope. not yet anyway. one more year. one more freakin' year. one more year which i'm very eager to spend with everyone.

and it's not like i dislike what i am now. what i am today is the result of everything i've experienced in my life so far. though there's room for improvement, i still like myself. i've only got one 'me' after all. what's the point with self-loathing?

now you may ask, why the "oh i remember the good old days" drama?

to tell you the truth, i really don't know. *nudges reader* (line seems familiar to you?) *grins*

no. but seriously. i REALLY do not have any idea why. i even asked myself earlier why i'm getting nostalgic.

maybe it's because it's summer. maybe it's because i'm nearing the finish line. maybe it's because life's getting more and more complicated. maybe it's because we're not getting any younger. maybe it's because i've lost so much yet i gained more. maybe it's because i threw out the old stuff and got the new ones. maybe it's because i'm here and not there. maybe it's because i'm counting the days. maybe it's because i fixed my stuff. maybe it's because there are so many reasons but all i need is just one answer.

i don't know.

but what i do know is that i wish i could get some of the past back in my life. we all do, right? there were a lot of things that i loved about myself before and i want them to be a part of me again. why i lost them along the way, i'll never recall. but i want to have them back again.

maybe that's why.

what do you think?

Warning: For those whose eyes glaze over sa mahahabang blog, BEWARE! Dibdibang sharing ‘to. I advise you not to go beyond for your safety. But if you’re stubborn or just plain bored, go ahead and make my day.

I know. The break started last week. But you can’t fault me for not blogging bout anything for like two weeks. Kaya nga break e. Ayoko munang magfunction ang brain ko for at least an entire day. It’s been working non-stop this semester. Isa pa, kapagod din lahat ng activities and projects na ihinabol para sa so-called “break” na ‘to; most of which must be passed on the first week of classes on January. Cruel, no?

But enough of my paglilitanya. I’ll talk—er, write—more about the pleasant stuff that happened recently. (^_^)

Where do I start?

Actually, di sya ganun ka-pleasant, but it was happy while it lasted. We went to the lantern parade in UP Diliman. Usually, the annual lantern parade is held in the UP Manila campus. After all, our campus was the birthplace of UP (bakit may angst??? LOL XD) but because of the centennial thingy… well, you know about that already so I won’t bore you with the details. Anyway, there were a lot of really nice lanterns and floats from various colleges and other associations/groups in the university. Each had their own unique presentations. It was colorful and bright; you can definitely feel the festivity in the air. The cheerful and perky spirit was upon us. We were in the right position and had an amazing view of the parade—we were in the first row!!! So I was excited and I happily took disgustingly numerous amounts of pictures of the event.

But then, those uber-cool-camera-laden-photographers-armed-with-no-doubt-freakin’-expensive-Nikons blocked our view. Sure, they were just a handful. At first. So we didn’t make a fuss about it. They were just doing their job. That was strike one.

Isa pang nakadagdag sa init ng ulo ko ay nung magsiharang ang mga marshall/police/guards whatever ng parade. At ang posing ng mga lolo, para lang nag-aabang ng jeep na masasakyan sa Taft. With matching kwentuhan and duro-duro effect. Ano kayo, turista? Gusto nyo kunan ko kayo ng picture? Weren’t you supposed to control the crowd and assist the participants? E bakit kayo nag-iinarteng audience jan? Strike two.

What really made me snap was when the audience went beyond the barricade. Kaya nga may harang, to contain people from spilling sa daraanan ng mga nag-mamarch. But no! those stupid idiots went ahead, may nagalit pa nung sinabihan naming na umupo naman sila. Sabi nya nauna daw sila. WTF?! Kung nauna kayo jan, anung tawag mo sa min?! We waited patiently for 2 hours tapos sasabihan mo ako na kayo pa ang na-agrabyado? Are you f*****g with me?! Ayun, bumingo. Strike three. (ok kalma lang, hinga, hinga)

So yeah… pleasant stuff.

We attended AdHere’s Christmas party/seminar. Great lecture, great food (yum for caramel bars!), great company, and insane amounts of photo ops!!! I swear, our entire batch is full of cam-whores, my self included. (^_^) that gathering was fun.

The next day my AVComm group met. We talked about stuff for our project. Nice to know we’re going somewhere, just not as fast and efficient as I hope for. But still, movement is movement. No matter how small and insignificant it may be.

Sunday, my supposed rest day. I at least got half a day to lounge around. Holiday grocery shopping is exhaustingly enjoyable. I just love pushing that shopping cart!! LOL

And now to the main event! The reunion of elementary graduates of Colegio de San Jose batch 2002!!! *applause*

Ok, I’ve gotta admit that I was a bit reluctant at first about this whole reunion thing. Yes, I felt excited about seeing my old friends, but I got worried that they, changed so much—WE changed so much—that I wouldn’t be able to talk to them the same way I did when we were younger. I was afraid we wouldn’t have that connection anymore. Erm, well, ok they would still have that bonding coz they live close to each other. But I wasn’t. And it scared me.

Boy, was I glad to be proven wrong.

They’re still the same old wacky bunch of crackheads from before. Dare I say, CRAZIER (what with all our antics and fun activities *wink, wink*). And all my worries were for naught. It’s interesting, really, that even though some of us spent seven years apart (which resulted in jumbled memories and difficulty in recollecting past experiences—ugh, we’re so old) we have even more things in common, more stuff to talk about, experiences that bond us to each other. Kulang na kulang ang dalawang araw para mag-usap at para alalahanin ang lahat nangyari sa amin noon; kulang na kulang para kumanta at magsaya.Grabe talaga, ang mga matatatag ang natira. Walang tulugan. Walang sawang chikahan at alaskahan. May mga nakilala pa akong new friends (big shout out to marquez and joy!)

I missed it so much. I missed them so much.

Now THAT was BEYOND pleasant. That was just BLOODY AWESOME.

Eew. I’m getting sappy.

Shet, halos kasing-haba nito yung paper na ipapasa ko next year. Ano ‘to, reflection paper of sorts?

You are The Star

Hope, expectation, Bright promises.

The Star is one of the great cards of faith, dreams realised

The Star is a card that looks to the future. It does not predict any immediate or powerful change, but it does predict hope and healing. This card suggests clarity of vision, spiritual insight. And, most importantly, that unexpected help will be coming, with water to quench your thirst, with a guiding light to the future. They might say you're a dreamer, but you're not the only one.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.